You sit down across from your therapist and, for a moment, it feels like catching up with a close friend. There’s warmth, familiarity, maybe even laughter. But there’s the problem: while therapy can feel friendly, it isn’t a friendship. And that distinction matters more than most people realize.

A “dual relationship,” in the therapy world, happens when personal and professional roles overlap. Maybe it’s a therapist treating their neighbor, or a friend asking to “make it official” and book sessions. On the surface, it might sound harmless, even convenient. But underneath, it can blur the very boundaries that make therapy safe.

Why does that matter? Because therapists hold a unique kind of influence. Their role is to protect your well-being, name hard truths, and hold space without bias. When friendship, family ties, or outside roles come into the room, the balance shifts. What should feel like a safe container can suddenly feel complicated, or even completely unsafe.

So what exactly counts as a dual relationship? In therapy, it’s when one person plays two roles at once: therapist and friend, therapist and colleague, therapist and neighbor. The professional line between care and personal connection becomes blurred, and that blur can have consequences.

The heart of the issue lies in power. Therapists carry training, authority, and the responsibility of guiding someone through their most vulnerable moments. They wield a measure of power in the therapy room. If the therapist already has a personal connection, objectivity becomes tangled. A friend might worry about hurting your feelings; a therapist needs to be able to say what you don’t want to hear but need to hear.

That’s why professional bodies, including the American Psychological Association, set clear rules against dual relationships. In fact, research shows that unclear boundaries increase the likelihood of clients dropping out of therapy prematurely. The stakes aren’t abstract because people’s healing and mental/emotional wellbeing is on the line.

So while you might imagine therapy with someone you know would feel easier, the reality is it can dilute the honesty and safety of the process. Boundaries create the container that allows therapy to do its work.

Boundaries are one of those quiet things that you only notice when they’re missing. In therapy, they’re the backbone of safety, trust, and growth. Without them, the whole relationship risks tipping out of balance.

That’s the crux of it. If a therapist already knows you outside the office, they bring history, assumptions, and emotions into sessions, whether they want to or not. Imagine telling your therapist something painful about your partner, knowing they’ve sat across from you at dinner parties. Suddenly, their response might feel less like professional guidance and more like personal opinion.

On the flip side, a therapist without prior ties has the freedom to be honest in ways friends often can’t. They can say, “Here’s a pattern I see,” even if it stings, because their role is to help you move forward, not to preserve a social bond. That difference may feel subtle, but in practice it shapes how deep you can go in your work.

Los Angeles therapy, like therapy anywhere, thrives on that structure. It’s the container that lets you open up without second-guessing how your words might ripple outside the room. And for many clients, that sense of safety is what makes it possible to share the parts of themselves they’ve never said out loud.

If only every situation were black and white. The truth is, therapy often operates in shades of gray and dual relationships are no exception. While the rules are clear in some cases (like not providing both couples counseling and individual therapy to the same partners), other situations require careful judgment.

For example, Grazel described her work as both a trainer and a supervisee within the Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) community. She might share a professional training space with someone who also provides her supervision. On paper, that overlap could raise eyebrows. In practice, the difference lies in clear communication, transparency, and respect for the supervisory role. The supervisor carries responsibility for protecting the therapeutic relationship, even while collaborating as a colleague elsewhere.

But not all gray areas can be navigated this way. Some scenarios, like a therapist seeing both partners of a couple individually, are considered outright conflicts of interest. The American Psychological Association is firm on this: dual relationships that risk impairing professional judgment or harming the client are prohibited.

Ethical dilemmas often come down to one question: does this situation put the client at risk? If the answer is yes, boundaries must be reinforced or the client referred elsewhere. If the answer is no, and safeguards are in place, then the professional relationship can continue.

For clients, knowing this helps take the mystery out of how therapists think about boundaries. It’s not about being cold or distant; it’s about protecting the integrity of the work so you can get the most out of your sessions.

It’s not unusual for therapy to feel warm, supportive, and yes, even friendly. After all, you’re sharing your most personal stories with someone who listens without judgment. But what happens when that feeling tips into “this is more like a friendship than therapy”?

Friendliness in therapy isn’t automatically a problem. In fact, sometimes it’s a doorway. Feeling comfortable enough to laugh, to joke, or to relax in the presence of your therapist can create the safety needed to go deeper. That sense of connection is part of what makes therapy work.

This is where the concept of transference often shows up. Clients sometimes project feelings they’ve had in other relationships onto their therapist, seeing them as a parent, a friend, even a partner. Rather than being a problem, this can become a powerful tool in therapy. When addressed openly, it offers a chance to understand old patterns in a safe environment.

The difference lies in the therapist’s stance. As long as they hold onto their professional role, moments of friendliness can enrich the work rather than derail it. But if either person begins to lose sight of those boundaries, it may be time to reassess.

If you’re starting couples therapy in Los Angeles and worry about boundaries, remember: it’s okay to bring those feelings into the room. Talking about them may be one of the most healing parts of the process.

So what actually happens if a therapist ignores these boundaries? The risks are more than theoretical, they can cause real harm.

The first risk is emotional. When therapy starts to resemble friendship, clients may feel betrayed if the therapist names something hard or challenges them. Instead of hearing it as professional guidance, they might hear it as criticism from a friend. That shift can damage trust and make it harder for the client to continue opening up.

The second risk is bias. If a therapist knows you outside of the office, they carry assumptions that inevitably color their perspective. Even with the best intentions, those blind spots can keep them from offering the clarity and neutrality you need.

For clients, the fallout can feel confusing and painful. Therapy is supposed to be a safe space, and when that safety is breached, it can take years to rebuild trust in the process. That’s why therapists work so diligently to keep personal and professional lives separate – not because they don’t care, but because they care deeply about protecting your healing.

Dual relationships may sound harmless at first; after all, isn’t it natural to want to see someone you already trust? But therapy is different. It works best when the roles are clearly defined, i.e. one role, one purpose, one safe container. That’s how the therapeutic space stays focused on your growth, not clouded by outside dynamics.

For therapists, boundaries aren’t barriers. They’re safeguards that let clients open up fully without worrying about bias, judgment, or blurred loyalties. And for clients, knowing those lines are firmly in place can make all the difference in how healing unfolds.

If you’re thinking about starting therapy in Los Angeles, take heart: GGPA’s ethical, well-boundaried therapists are here, ready to walk with you through the hard and hopeful parts of your journey.