Can therapy help me with relationships and social dynamics?
Listen carefully: You’re not too much. You’re not too forgetful. You’re not broken.
If you’ve ever walked away from a conversation feeling like you misread the moment, or like others just don’t “get” you, there might be a reason that you haven’t considered. Many neurodivergent folks live with a low hum of social disconnection, even in relationships that are meant to feel safe. You might try harder, speak softer, show up differently. And still, the message you receive is: “Why can’t you just be easier to understand?”
The truth is, our brains relate in different ways, every one of us. And in a world wired for neurotypical connection, those differences can feel like faults. But therapy doesn’t try to “fix” who you are. The right kind of therapy, one that’s neurodiversity-affirming and emotionally attuned, can help you stop blaming yourself for being misunderstood and start finding ways to connect that actually work for you.
At Grazel Garcia Psychotherapy & Associates, we specialize in individual and couples therapy in Los Angeles for clients who are tired of masking, tired of conflict, and tired of feeling like they don’t belong.
In this article, we’ll explore how therapy can help neurodivergent individuals and couples build more authentic, sustainable relationships without erasing who you are to do it. Let’s begin.
Watch the full interview here!
- Understanding the Relationship Struggles of Neurodivergent Folks
- When Two Brains Collide – Adapting Couples Therapy for Neurodiversity
- When ADHD Looks Like “You Don’t Care” – Therapy as Translation
- Building Social Support Without Burning Out
- Boundaries Without Masking
- A Different Kind of Relating Is Possible
Understanding the Relationship Struggles of Neurodivergent Folks
Relationships are built on understanding and when your way of understanding the world is different from the people around you, it can feel like you’re always one step behind (or one step too much). For many neurodivergent individuals, this difference isn’t about lacking empathy or love; it’s learning how to live in a world that often misreads or mislabels your intentions.
Maybe you’ve been called forgetful when your mind is just full. Maybe someone interpreted your need for space as disinterest. Or maybe you’ve heard, too many times, that you’re “too sensitive,” “too intense,” or “too distracted.” Over time, this kind of feedback teaches you to question yourself, or worse, to hide parts of who you are.
“Everybody thinks differently. If we stop pathologizing someone’s brain that works differently… we’ll have less stress in our lives.”
Therapy offers a space to deconstruct these internalized narratives. Instead of asking, “What’s wrong with me?” therapy invites a new question: “What if this is just a different way of being in relationship?”
Many clients come in feeling broken, but what they’re really experiencing is chronic misattunement. Individual therapy in Los Angeles can help illuminate the impact of neurodivergent traits on relational dynamics without blame or shame. It gives language to experiences that have been long misunderstood and helps clients find relational tools that don’t require self-erasure.
Research supports this need. It’s long been reported that most people with ADHD report difficulty in romantic relationships and autistic individuals are more likely to experience social conflict or isolation. But these challenges aren’t inevitable. With compassionate support and the right therapeutic approach, neurodivergent folks can create relationships that feel deeply connected, just on different terms.
Feeling like relationships are harder than they should be? You deserve connection that meets you where you are. Reach out to explore how individual therapy in Los Angeles can help.
When Two Brains Collide – Adapting Couples Therapy for Neurodiversity
Even the strongest couples can get caught in loops that feel impossible to break. But when two people process the world in fundamentally different ways – say, one partner is neurodivergent and the other is not – those loops can feel more like brick walls. Conversations turn into conflicts. Misunderstandings get personal. And before long, both partners are left wondering: “Why does this keep happening?”
That’s where adapted couples therapy becomes a game changer.
“It’s a system that’s gonna have to work for both brains, not for one particular brain.”
Neurotypical brains often prioritize focus, linear thinking, and “one thing at a time.” Neurodivergent brains, especially in folks with ADHD or autism, might see every idea as important, switching gears frequently or communicating in bursts that seem disorganized to their partner. But the mismatch isn’t the problem. The problem is expecting sameness in how people process and express themselves.
That’s why Grazel Garcia adapts Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) in Los Angeles to help couples understand not just what they’re arguing about, but why they’re getting stuck. Instead of forcing compromise based on neurotypical norms, she helps couples build a shared system of connection that respects both ways of thinking.
Take, for example, a couple struggling with decision-making. One partner wants to focus on “what matters right now.” The other can’t not consider all the options at once. They’re not avoiding each other or dismissing their partner’s concerns; they’re just operating with different mental roadmaps. When therapy helps them understand this, it softens judgment and opens space for new patterns.
And the science backs this up. Emotionally Focused Therapy boasts a 70–75% success rate for improving distressed relationships (ICEEFT). Meanwhile, nearly 5% of adults live with ADHD, many of them navigating relationships without the support or understanding they need.
Couples therapy in Los Angeles, paired with neurodiversity-informed individual work, gives partners a chance to slow down, learn each other’s internal languages, and begin again, together.
You and your partner don’t need to think alike to feel close. Let therapy help you build a relationship that honors both your minds.
When ADHD Looks Like “You Don’t Care” – Therapy as Translation
Few things hurt more in a relationship than feeling dismissed. For many neurodivergent people, especially those with ADHD, this pain isn’t caused by a lack of care but by how care is expressed… or forgotten.
Picture this: You agree to pick up something important for your partner. You genuinely mean to. But then your mind floods with three other tasks, a new idea, and the sound of your phone buzzing. You forget. Again. And your partner, understandably, feels like they don’t matter.
It’s a familiar cycle, and one that Grazel Garcia sees often in her practice.
“When the ADHD partner is aware of what’s happening, it’s easier to talk about it. When they’re not, psychoeducation is essential.”
When ADHD traits like poor follow-through or time blindness go unexplained, they often get misinterpreted as apathy or avoidance. Therapy becomes a place to translate intention into understanding not just for the ADHD partner, but for their loved ones, too. Grazel helps partners learn to separate brain-based challenges from emotional rejection.
She also makes space for both sides. The neurodivergent partner needs compassion, but so does the one who feels forgotten.
“Validating the exhaustion of the non-ADHD partner is so helpful… This is an ongoing cycle for both of you.”
In these moments, couples therapy in Los Angeles isn’t just about better behavioral or communication strategies, it’s about emotional repair. With therapeutic guidance from someone who’s seen it before, couples can shift from “You don’t care” to “Your brain works differently and now I get it.”
Some numbers to consider:
- One third of adults with ADHD report difficulty with time management and follow-through (ADDitude).
- Only 12% of partners in ADHD-affected relationships feel fully understood without professional support (ADHD Institute).
The healing begins when therapy helps both partners stop taking everything personally and start seeing the patterns as the real problem, not each other.
CTAIf you’re tired of repeating the same conflicts and misunderstanding each other, therapy can offer a translation service for both of you. Let’s talk about what’s really going on.
Building Social Support Without Burning Out
The world often tells us that to be healthy, we need a robust social life. But for many neurodivergent individuals, especially those with ADHD or autism, “being social” can feel like running a marathon in a crowd that doesn’t follow the same map.
You might crave connection and, at the same time, dread it. Parties feel overwhelming. Small talk feels meaningless. Group chats go unanswered for days. And then the guilt creeps in… “Why can’t I just keep up?”
Grazel Garcia works with clients to redefine what support looks like, not based on societal standards, but on your nervous system’s capacity. That means helping you find rhythms of connection that feel nourishing, not draining.
“This is an ongoing cycle for both of you… It can be very helpful to just feel heard.”
In neuro-inclusive individual therapy, clients learn to:
- Identify what types of social interaction are most fulfilling
- Set sustainable boundaries around social energy
- Practice scripts for initiating or declining connection without guilt
- Build relationships based on mutual understanding, not obligation
44% of autistic adults report difficulty maintaining long-term friendships, often due to sensory overload or communication differences, so there is a real need for these skills.
The good news is that therapy can offer a roadmap for finding and nurturing meaningful relationships without losing yourself in the process. With the right support, you can create a social life that honors your capacity and still keeps you connected.
Longing for more connection, but on your terms? Let individual therapy in Los Angeles help you build support systems that fit who you are.
Boundaries Without Masking
For many neurodivergent people, the word “boundaries” comes tangled with years of unspoken rules: Don’t be too much. Don’t say no. Don’t make it weird. So instead of setting boundaries, many learn to mask: suppressing their needs, feelings, or stims to avoid conflict or rejection.
But masking, while sometimes necessary for survival, comes at a cost. It erodes authenticity. It drains energy. And over time, it can make even close relationships feel like performance.
Therapy creates a space where unmasking becomes safe, and where boundaries become a bridge to connection, not a wall against it.
“Therapy helps us find the things we both can do individually for a harmonious relationship.”
That harmony comes from learning to recognize when you’re compromising too much, speak your needs in ways that feel aligned with your nervous system, set clear limits gently and stay in a relationship with abandoning yourself.
With the right support, boundaries stop feeling like demands. They become invitations for honesty, sustainability, and self-respect.
You don’t have to mask to be loved. Individual therapy in Los Angeles can help you find your voice, and use it with confidence.
A Different Kind of Relating Is Possible
If you’ve ever felt like you were speaking a different language in your relationships, you’re likely not imagining it. It might be that you are, and that difference is not a defect. It’s a different way of connecting, and it deserves to be understood, not corrected.
With the right support, therapy can become a place to unlearn shame, de-escalate conflict, and build relational systems that reflect who you truly are.
“We don’t have to be against each other; it’s the cycle we can look at and de-escalate.”
Top 7 takeaways:
- Neurodivergence is not a flaw, it’s a different way of relating.
Many neurodivergent individuals feel misunderstood in relationships, not because they lack empathy or effort, but because their communication and processing styles differ from neurotypical expectations. Therapy helps reframe these differences as valid, not broken. - Therapy provides language and tools for navigating misattunement.
Rather than asking “What’s wrong with me?”, therapy invites clients to explore how neurodivergent traits impact relationships and how to navigate those differences without feeling or asserting shame, blame, or self-erasure. - Couples therapy can be adapted to honor both partners’ brains.
When one partner is neurodivergent and the other is not, mismatches in focus, communication, or priorities are common. Therapy helps both partners co-create systems of understanding instead of forcing one to conform. - ADHD behaviors are often misread as emotional neglect
Traits like forgetfulness or time blindness can create painful misunderstandings. Therapy acts as a “translation service,” helping partners see the difference between brain-based challenges and intentional disregard. - Sustainable social support is possible, with the right boundaries.
Therapy helps neurodivergent clients define connection on their own terms. That might mean redefining what friendships look like, learning to decline invitations without guilt, or prioritizing quality over quantity. - Boundaries don’t require masking.
Masking often feels safer than stating needs, but it comes at a cost to authenticity and wellbeing. Therapy offers a space to practice setting boundaries in ways that are clear, compassionate, and aligned with your nervous system. - With the right support, new relational patterns are possible.
Therapy helps clients and couples move from cycles of misunderstanding and conflict to cycles of understanding and repair—offering not just survival, but transformation.
You deserve relationships that feel like home. Let’s explore that together through therapy in Los Angeles.
Grazel Garcia Psychotherapy & Associates is one of the leading individual and couples therapy practices in the wider Los Angeles area. Specializing in treating root causes through the lens of EFT, GGPA clients can expect a warm, culturally-attuned approach to therapy. Call 323-487-9003 and schedule your free consultation today!
